I've been doing a lot of reading lately. Subject? Mostly personal development.
I've been trying to find a real subject to share with you, something that was relevant and something that I could talk about with the confidence of going through that path and conquering.
The more I thought about it the more I realized the one thing my close friends usually come to me in search of: relationship advice.
Now, I'm not trying to become a new age Oprah or even say I am an expert when it comes to relationships. The one thing I am good at is being honest with myself and being able to read other people. I am happily married, though it wasn't an easy road to get here or it is an easy road to stay, but if this is what you want, I can share my story with you.
I am 26 years old and I would say it took me 20 years to actually acknowledge myself as a person who mattered. My whole life I thought I would become someone important but always felt like I wasn't important at that moment. I disliked myself more than I can explain. I felt like I wasn't worthy of a real relationship or any accomplishment for that matter. I disliked myself so much I would avoid mirrors as much as I could and whenever I saw myself in one I wouldn't see what I was, all I saw was everything I was not.
It took me 20 years to meet the first person who would make me feel like I was worth something: my now husband. He doesn't really know it, but the day I realized he actually liked me was the day I felt more empowered than ever before. It was the day I changed the perspective I had of myself for better forever.
It is sad to realize that someone else had to see the good in me to make me believe in myself. But I am glad it happened because I would still be a slave of my own fears if I hadn't met him.
This is the first truth anyone needs to know if they want to have a sane relationship: love yourself.
Your love cannot depend on what others think of you, of what society thinks is cool to do or anything like that. It has to be real pure love: the kind that forgives the kind that would do anything for someone else. This time, though, it is not for someone else, it is for yourself. Love yourself in a way that you would do anything to make sure you are happy.
Love yourself in a way that you will cross the oceans just to find a shot to make your dreams come true. Love yourself in a way that others will fall in love with you because they will see you are being honest in the way you are.
Once you get this first step down, you will be able to follow along with the rest. For now, this is my advice and I hope it serves you well.